Loneliness

“Loneliness” is often misspelled and worse, misunderstood. Hats off to the volunteers who call people who’ve recently lost a loved one. The calls are conducted through an organized hospice program where the volunteer is often someone who has gone through the pain of watching a close relative die from a terminal illness. I’ve been on both ends of the line, so I know how it helps.

But there are countless people living alone, stuck in the past or suffering in the present. I’ll be the first to admit that I have to be reminded about the lonely and how they sit in the front pews at church, are first in line at weekday movie matinees, in the corner at Starbucks, or browsing in bookstores. They’re everywhere and they’re not always recognizable and they may not live alone.

We pressure ourselves—at least some of us do—to assist the less fortunate: the poor, the hungry, the feeble. The lonely are the easiest to help and we can start with a simple “hello.”

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, about 25 percent of the population in the United States lives alone. A Duke University study revealed that 25 percent of our population has no one to confer with when making a big personal decision. I don’t think it’s necessary to determine if a person is lonely; better to assume that at one time or another everyone is lonely and, therefore, a little friendliness will go a long way.

My mantra this year is “be friendly” because that has not always been the case with me. And like a recovering addict, my first step is to acknowledge my old habit and to harness the willpower to correct it. Smile.